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Go Negative Early

Filed under Advertising, Apple, Marketing, Microsoft

Microsoft really needs to stop fucking around with its advertising.

Jerry Seinfeld? This is not a Bill Gates keynote.

Whether you like it or not, when it comes to operating systems it’s still a two-horse race, and the company needs to take a page from the Republican playbook.

“Go negative early and often.”

Apple did.

Here are some suggested slogans for a new Windows ad campaign.


Grow Up. Use Windows.

Isn’t It About Time You Learned How To Use A Proper Computer?

Stop Preening.

Deep Down, You Know Your Mac Blows.

Mac OS – Face It, Even Vista’s Better Than That Gay Shit.

Windows – If You Can’t Figure Out How To Use It, We Don’t Want You Anyway.

Hey, Dude, Pretty Mac! Compensating For Something?

[Image showing Speak-N-Spell evolving into Mac evolving into Gameboy evolving into Windows PC]

It’s A Computer, Not A Pair Of Fucking Sneakers.

Mac OS – More Expensive, Does Less Shit

“If I Wear A Black Turtleneck And Grow A Fucking Goatee, Will That Shut You Up?”

2008-09-06  ::  Kevin Murphy


  1. chuppler
    10 September 2008 @ 3:44 pm

    How about:
    Mac – “We’re really sorry about the 90’s. But we still won’t cover your computer claims. Suck it.”
    Windows – “We know we suck. But even Mac’s use Windows.”